Sex and Work

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I love ShowTime’s “Hou$e of Lie$” starring Don Cheadle and Kristin Bell as a team of management consultants that basically go into corporations and convince them that they need to hire them as consultants to help save their company from total and interment demise. Twisted in the middle of all this is a bunch of back stabbing, strategy, drugs and lewd sexual behavior.

Without going on too much, the season finale centered on a pending merger and class action, sexual harassment quid pro quo lawsuit. I love when the HR play comes into it. What inspired me was when Cheadle’s character said “Are you kidding me? Every company in America has sexual harassment.” And he’s right. Millions of dollars to train people how to avoid and report it but often times it ends teaching people how to do it better. And it never ends. Wars have been waged, fought, won and lost for the all mighty love of a woman.

There is no denying it, sex sells and it’s powerful. You really can’t stop it; not with your kids or your employees.

If you have ever investigated a sexual harassment claim you know how difficult it can be. Getting to the truth is like finding a needle in a hay stack. I’ve seen consensual sexual relationships turn ugly. It was all good when they were stealing moments on company time, making goo-goo eyes in the boardroom but what happens when one of the folks has a change of heart? They want to go back to their spouse, or they see new piece of tail that they want to try out. Guess who’s left to clean up the mess? You and the maid!

What’s HR to do? You can write a policy but how many times has that stopped someone from getting it on?

I’ve seen men throw it all way on an office romance. (Case in point “Corporate Hoes & Tricks” and “Unethical Behavior is a Team Effort”) I can recall this dude was so bold, he was married and having an affair with a co-worker, and he’d go to her cubicle and handle his business right there, bang! bang! bang!

You have to be prepared to deal with some office smushing. It will happen. I’ve talked about the reality of the rumor mill at work. Unfortunately workplace rumors are often times true. I don’t have official stats on this but the rumor mill is spot on, from layoffs to terminations, and of course affairs.

So don’t be caught with your pants down, ahem…get with the legal department, draft some affidavits so when and if this these relationships fall apart and they probably will fall apart, you’re covered. Because you can’t stop sex, you can only hope to contain it!

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